My Friend Digger


I want to take this moment to introduce you to an old friend of mine. His real name is Karl Muller but everyone just calls him Digger. A person that I used to highly respect and cherish and a person who has truly earned a special memory in my heart. Although our friendship was relatively new by some people's standards, you saw me though some of the most trying times in my life and I thank you. I have learned so much from you and in the process have learned so much about myself. Funny, how we were both born under the same sun sign of Sagittarius and how we could have so much in common but with almost 20 years of distance between us.

In our travels there have been many who thought we were lovers but the reality is that I have a "significant other" in my life who plays a powerful role in that department. Still there are many who would rather conjure and formulate all types of fantasies about sordid affairs that never happened. Sometimes it's more fun to keep them guessing.

You taught me to slow down and to take time to enjoy the simpler things in life. As an impatient person, this was a very hard thing for me. Especially in times where there was so much struggle and despair. Though I tried to see the light at the end of tunnel, I was usually lucky if I can catch a glimpse of a firefly's flicker.

When me and my partner's business collapsed and we were forced to close its doors you were there to help move, pack, lug, transport the final remains and you hugged me as I cried helplessly feeling like a failure. You promised that the pain would go away and it did. You assured me that I had done all I could and maybe it wasn't really meant to be in the first place.

When I hadn't seen my mother in over 5 years, you flew to New England and escorted her here to my home in Texas so we could be reunited. Something I would never have expected and a time well remembered.

When I lost my job of 13 years and was in financial ruin, you offered a shoulder to cry on and you told me that things would mend over time. Though never knowing what it was really like, you wondered how you would handle the emotional turmoil if you were walking in my shoes when I filed for bankruptcy. For that, I'm grateful and I have learned that life doesn't revolve around the almighty buck.

When I injured my back and could barely walk, you stayed with me and did your best to take care of my needs be it a straw in my cup to drink water from, or to tie my shoes when I couldn't bend over. It was then you could feel the pain I was going through and how I wished I could just die and get it over with. Not once did you ask for anything in return and not once did you ever complain about being there to make sure I got the very basic things I needed to get well. You taxied me to doctors, leant me money, and called me every day to cheer me up and for that I am grateful.

You were my close friend and there was nothing in the world that I wouldn't do for you. No, you weren't my lover, but instead, you were a bond that was as thick as blood relatives. You were the big brother I always wished for... And I was the wild life-force kid that kept you free and youthful. Through my eyes you traveled, touched, tasted, and experienced many things along the way.

Just as you were a teacher for me, I was a teacher for you. We were mirrors in time. For you, I was the reflection of days past and for me, you were the reflection of days to come. My spirituality teaches: "Love is the Law" and "Love under will" and you were the perfect example of such love. I sometimes wonder if I could ever repay you for all the things you did for me and then it hits me, I already have, for there is surely something "special" about myself that kept you hanging around and I've come to the conclusion that the same thing is what kept you in my thoughts all the time. It's the true essence of love, respect and compassion for someone you called your best friend. You taught me how to savor and enjoy life and to never be afraid of growing older. And I taught you that it's never to late to try something new.